August 13, 2004
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Are you a star seed?
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An old Buddhist monk was traveling with a younger monk on a long pilgrimage.
Being devote monks they had taken a vow of chastity.
As they approached a river they notice a young maiden by the riverbank.
The young woman explained to the monks that the river was to swift for her and she asked if the two monks would assist her.
As the older monk stroked his chin but the younger monk immediately hoisted the maiden to sit on his shoulder… with one leg on each side of his head. He carried the lady safely to the other bank and the monks and the lady parted ways.
The old monk was totally frustrated at the younger monk for engaging in such contact but he remained silent…
As the hours grew and fatigue began to set in the older monk finally exploded in a fit of anger…
Old monk:
“I can not believe you!
How could you take such a risk…?
You were an idiot for giving in to such temptation
Don’t you understand how destructive your attachment to desire can be!”
Young monk:
” Brother, I put the girl down 4 hours ago…
You are still carrying her.”
.
The turtle Wins by a hare.
The hare loses by a nose
Well no one is answering,….. I told you!
Are you sure he said to call him on the bone
Fernando
When the Director told you to blow up the damn thing!
He ment Castro’s place.
jokes from around the net….
I recently drove about 2000 miles on various U.S. highways. Along the side of the road there were many shrines marking where people had died in auto accidents. Almost all the shrines included a cross. I only saw a couple with Stars of David.
There’s only one possible conclusion: Jews are better drivers than Christians.
If God wanted most of us to see the sunrise, He would have scheduled it later in the day.
“It’s no exaggeration to say that the undecideds could go one way or another.”
George Bush, US President
If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
He who hesitates is probably right….??
The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
It’s always darkest before you step on the cat’s tail.
The most enjoyable way to follow a vegetable diet is to let the cow eat it, and then eat the cow.
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
Who says nothing is impossible… my uncle has been doing nothing for years.
Bob Dole’s Viagra ad, “I didn’t win the Presidency, but with Viagra I can act like I did!”
If you don’t care where you are, you ain’t lost.
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
Money can’t buy love. But it CAN rent a very close imitation.
Always try to be modest. And be damn proud of it!
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hands….
Attempt to get a new car for your spouse-it’ll be a great trade!
Borrow money from pessimists-they don’t expect it back.
Half the people you know are below average.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
“I don’t feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.”
John Wayne
“It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.”
Al Gore, Vice President
Have a great weekend !
Comments (10)
Hmm … I have to say that the jokes were really funny.
“If you don’t care where you are, you ain’t lost.” :goodjob: I love that one.
Though, that is an interesting little story about the monks.
Thanks for the laughs in return I shall offer one that is posted in my Lab that makes me smile often
” It goes without saying… if you know I mean ”
Just appreciating the atmosphere. :sunny:
LMAO! Thanks.. I needed that!
i have heard the monk analogy before….its a good one.
makes you really think about what our intentions are towards others…and our faults… :yes:
The monk analogy reaches entirely the wrong conclusion. The old monk is filled with jealousy and bitterness that he didn’t get a pair of pulchritudinous thighs either side of his cheeks and he cannot let it go so he takes it out on the young monk. You know that’s true (unless he’s had his balls off).
Dear Dos,
Two monks walk into a bar…….
Michael F. Nyiri, poet,philosopher,fool :coolman:
:shysmile: thanks guys
thanks Dos
for
I saw a bumpersticker that reminds me of some of these sayings..
“He who laughs last, thinks slowest” :giggle: